“Just as intentionally liberating oneself from the culturally ingrained and enforced performance of heteronormativity is sometimes referred to as queering, intentionally liberating oneself from the culturally ingrained and enforced performance of neuronormativity can be thought of as neuroqueering.”
Nick Walker, Neuroqueer Heresies
Here are just some ways I’ve been neuroqueering my life. It’s an ongoing practice of rejecting neuronormative expectations and figuring out what truly works for me.
Unlearning neuronormative bullshit
The first step in neuroqueering my life was unlearning all the neuronormative BS I’d been conditioned to believe (such as believing my life wouldn’t truly begin until I learn to appear completely neurotypical). It’s an ongoing work in progress!
Connecting with neurokin
The best thing that has happened to me since launching Autistic As Fxxk is finding and connecting with my neurokin. It’s so validating to find an online community of people who get you without having to explain yourself so much!
I’ve also been getting involved in IRL activities that interest me (such as joining a punk band!) and allow me to meet and make friends with like-minded people.
Inventing strategies that work for me
Being Neurodivergent in a neurotypical world means getting creative with how I navigate life. Here are some strategies I developed through trial and error:
- How I get shit done (or at least get started) while having executive functioning challenges
- How I deal with impostor syndrome and rejection sensitivity
- How I prepare before going to an unfamiliar place
- Things I do differently when I’m low on spoons
Using my special interests as self-care
My special interests are the ultimate source of joy in my life, so why not use them as self-care?
I practice my bass for at least 5 minutes daily to unwind after a long day. I have a playlist of stimmy Mike Patton songs that I listen to whenever I need to focus on work. My phone has an album of screenshots of wholesome Zack de la Rocha anecdotes that I like to look at whenever I feel shitty. Those are just some ways I use my special interests as self-care!
Defining myself
Growing up as a young girl who didn’t speak, people tended to make a lot of assumptions about me that were inaccurate and limiting. I started Autistic As Fxxk as a way to reclaim control over my own narrative and assert my humanity and individuality.
See also: 6 ways to be unapologetically Autistic
“Queer not as being about who you’re having sex with, that can be a dimension of it, but queer as being about the self that is at odds with everything around it and has to invent and create and find a place to speak and to thrive and to live.”